allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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