haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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