just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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