what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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