Sponge bath it is.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
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Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
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Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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