Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize