my room smells like sperm. sweet.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize