Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
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I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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