My first STD was from a foam party
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize