tell your sister to shave her snatch
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize