Why does Corona taste like a burp?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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