He is an equal opportunity slut.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
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My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
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You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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