so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
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