I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize