are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
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She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
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Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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