Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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