you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize