I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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