she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize