So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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