i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize