There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you win again, gameday.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I AM VODKA MAN
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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