oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
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Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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