I'm sorry my penis didn't work
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
smell my finger.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
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