i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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