K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
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when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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