Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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