$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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