Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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