i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
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I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
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