We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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