it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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