Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i wish my penis had a tongue
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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