i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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