oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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