at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
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