grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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