You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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