I just cut my nipple shaving
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Drunk is not a location!
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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