did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I love you. Go after that dick
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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