when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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