thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
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He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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