Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize