Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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