before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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