i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize