Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
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So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
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I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Your penis caused this!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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