The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
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