can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I FOUND THE LEGS
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize