did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
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I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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