Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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